A Curious Mind
What makes some people ask so many questions and others so few? Is it a lack of interest in general? Is it a shame of being ridiculed? Fear of being perceived as inconvenient? A shy personality type?
I didn't think curiosity had such an important role. It seemed so trivial. If you want to know, you ask. Not every time, though. Only when feeling comfortable.
Reading the book "A Curious Mind" by Brian Grazer in 2017 changed the way I approached curiosity in the subsequent years. I remember setting the goal of asking one question every day, for the next month. When a question popped up in my mind, I didn't ignore it. I spitted it out. Because I was doing a bachelor's degree at the time, I used the classroom environment to experiment and practice my curiosity. The reward for having the courage to look dumb or annoying was a rising interest in the things I was learning — the more questions I asked, the more I wanted to immerse myself in the concepts.
Re-reading this book in 2020, helped me to re-energize my interest in curiosity and understand its importance, not only in a learning setting but within relationships, with others and myself. It was interesting to realize the number of details I never asked about. I was aware of the big events, like a friend's new job, but I had no idea what she was doing on a day-to-day basis. I had gym anxiety (it's a thing) and the conviction I would never join one. This only changed when I approached myself curiously and understood the root of those beliefs. I'm now a member of the gym. It's a gratifying experience to get more intimate with others and ourselves, just by asking questions.
But the most important question isn't about your friend's life. Nor is it about your own fears. And much less about a complex equation. The most important question is: Are you willing to ask?
“We are all trapped in our own way of thinking, trapped in our own way of relating to people. We get so used to seeing the world our way that we come to think that the world is the way we see it.”